Lifes strange way of reminding you of things
Last Friday I was in CT (and freezing for a Fla boy) at the CT State Police Academy teaching a class of police officers how to investigate computer crimes. As is usually the case I talked about some other topics on breaks with the "guys" (gals too). One that I always bring up no matter where I am teaching around the country is "Do you carry your off duty firearm all the time?"
You see I ask this as I now carry mine everywhere that I go. Being a full time officer myself I am permitted by my department to do that, and mandated by conscious. So I always try to sneak a little lesson in with my fellow officers on my feelings on this subject. I tell them I had a life changing experience one day. I was sitting in a room of 600 other law enforcement officers listening to a man by the name of Col. Dave Grossman (Ret.). He was the guest speaker at the Florida Department of Law Enforcements High Liability Trainers Conference. I had never listened to or even heard of Dave before that day.
Being an ex-army man myself I was impressed enough with his military career as they presented him to already give some weight to his words. I would sit and listen with intent. Then he began to speak. From the first few minutes I knew something was different about this speaker and the information he was talking out. I began to understand what he was talking about. He was talking of the responsibility we (police officers) have and of the ability to do good. To protect not only our own families but those around us even when off duty. He told of events that other officers had experienced. He told of the physiological and psychological changes we go through under stress. He spoke with authority and knowledge, passion and enthusiasm. I was hooked. Then he pulled me in.
He told the story of a police officer in church. Who, as 90% of officers you ask, did not carry his off-duty gun in a church. One Sunday while sitting in the last few rows of the church listening to the sermon a gunman burst in and began to shoot his fellow parishioners. The officer was there with his family and all he could do is push them to the ground and pray that they were not shot and killed by the gunman. The gunman as he continued to shoot walked past the officer’s row and then eventually left and was latter killed by responding officers outside. When asked what he thought about when this was happening all he could think of was he could have killed that guy before he killed more people. He said he never felt so helpless in my life. He felt he couldn’t even protect his family.
I thought of an incident that had happened to me many moons ago when I was an officer with about 5 years on the road. I was riding as the passenger in a car on the way to a wedding rehearsal. Who would carry a gun to that type of function? So I didn’t. While drive down a 4 lane roadway a pick-up truck pulls up next us and paces our vehicle. This is not strange in itself. I had my window down and I heard the driver yelling at me. I turned to look and when I did he pulled a gun and pointed out his window right at my face. It looked about as big as a shotgun (in reality it was a .44 magnum double barrel derringer, which was found later to be loaded). I yelled for the driver of the car I was in to stop and when she did the truck tried to ram us. Fortunately for me there was an officer I knew running RADAR nearby and after a quick exchange of words he went after the truck with me close behind. We arrested the individual and I ended up missing the rehearsal doing paperwork. I also had to go home and get my ID and Gun.
I had put this event out of my mind until I heard Dave talk about this very issue and I vowed and to this day, carry my off-duty firearm everywhere I go. My son’s school, my church, Disney World, everywhere the law permits me as a cop. I will not become a sheep, as Dave would say, thanks Dave. And it was great talking with you Friday. I’m going to take you up on your offer, I promise.
Chris Wagoner
24 year police veteran, ex-Army Sgt.